The Day He Said It



July 20th, 2015

Jaime came home from work. It was a really normal day. We hadn't text much throughout the day. I was washing dishes/getting dinner ready, when he said it.

"I'm ready to start a family."

I smiled that big cheesy smile and turned around. "Really?" I turned back around to my work. 'Yeah right.' I was thinking.

"Yes, I've been doing a lot of thinking. We'll never 'be ready',  we'll never have enough money, so why wait anymore?"

"Are you being serious? For real??" All while thinking, he's joking. He's been so against having kids and sticking with the 5 year plan of 'saving and doing' before we bring kids into our life. I had submitted to my husband's plan, all while still desiring a baby of my own. I just couldn't really believe he would just up and decide to change it up.

"Yes, I'm dead serious." he said.

I fell into his arms and hugged him super tight. This moment is what I've always dreamed of. Finally, we get to have babies! The only other thing I truly desired in life. I teared up. Walked back to my station at the kitchen in the camper.

"Can we start tonight?"

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Normally, when a blogger goes silent, I've realized it usually means that she's pregnant. I wish that was my case. But fast forward to 10 months later from the conversation above and we are still trying.

We've gone through every emotion you can think of. I've googled every possible way to conceive faster. I've tried various herbal supplements, teas, vitamins, etc. Temping with a Basal Temperature Thermometer and using the app Kindara to track everything, has been the best route we've tried (for the last 5 months.) It gives me a piece of mind and I don't waste money on pregnacy tests with it because I can literally see if I'm pregnant or not. (Please feel free to email me with any questions you have about it.)

I'm not medically classified as infertile, since we haven't tried for a whole year yet. And we haven't gone to see a fertility specialist yet either. The purpose of this post is so that we can have more prayer warriors on our side.

I have a doctors appointment next week and I'm not sure how it's going to go. It's possible that I have endometriosis, but, honestly, I have no clue. That's why I'm going to find out. This is just a place to start to see if there's anything medically we can do.

We know God gave us the desire to be parents. We also know, it's all in God's timing, there's nothing we can do to change that. So we just ask for your prayers! Pray for us to have grace, acceptance, and peace as we go through this.

I know I'm not alone in this. There's many couples out there struggling just the same as us. I want to use my platform (the blog), as a way to connect with other women trying to conceive. Maybe a support system of sorts. I know I have two friends who are also struggling with conception and there's immediate comfort in talking to them about it and knowing you're not alone. I want to be that for you guys too! It's hard to be positive and not drown in pity for myself and Jaime. I want to vent, cry, and get angry most days just like anyone else. But you can't live a good life like that.

So I'm choosing to fill it with joy. As always, I'm looking to God to help me deal with our situation. And in the mean time, I'm choosing to make the most of my days with Jaime before we add a bundle of joy into the mix. So we ask that you keep us in your prayers during this time. Thanks guys!

I'm here if you ever want to talk.
Email me at faithnallthings{at}yahoo{dot}com or DM on instagram or fb.

11 comments:

  1. My husband and I are in the same boat. It can be so frustrating and every negative is devastating but His timing is everything and we trust the process because we trust in Him. Prayers for you and your husband! <3

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    1. I'm so sorry. I wouldn't wish this heartache on anybody. Yeah, you definitely get tired of seeing the negatives. Yes, absolutely! We know God's timing is everything and we trust Him. Thank you! I'll be praying for you guys as well, God knows you by name and knows the desires of your hearts.

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  2. We tried for nearly a year before I got pregnant with Connor. I completely understand all of the emotions that you've went through. My sister and I both have endometriosis. Which made it harder to conceive, but now we both have little boys...and I have another on the way. We had to stop trying. We stopped tracking ovulation dates, stopped waiting for unwanted periods, stopped thinking about it. That's very hard to do, but when we stopped over thinking the process, that's when "it" happened. All in God's time. Y'all will make wonderful parents...try not to worry about it too much. That's what helped us the most. I hope you get good news from the doctor! Prayers for you guys!

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    1. I'm sorry you've had to go through it as well. That's great! I know it's possible to have kids with endometriosis, I'd just like to know if I do have it. Thanks for the advice and we appreciate the prayers even more so! Thank you!

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  3. We tried for nearly a year before I got pregnant with Connor. I completely understand all of the emotions that you've went through. My sister and I both have endometriosis. Which made it harder to conceive, but now we both have little boys...and I have another on the way. We had to stop trying. We stopped tracking ovulation dates, stopped waiting for unwanted periods, stopped thinking about it. That's very hard to do, but when we stopped over thinking the process, that's when "it" happened. All in God's time. Y'all will make wonderful parents...try not to worry about it too much. That's what helped us the most. I hope you get good news from the doctor! Prayers for you guys!

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  4. Hi sweet lady. My husband and I have been struggling with infertility for years. I have PCOS, Endo and my husband has low morphology percentages. I know this moment and I know how scary it can be. We've seen God work through our journey in so many ways. We're four years in and it's hard, I won't lie...but I would have never guessed what an amazing sisterhood I've found through trying to conceive. If you have any questions, I've been there girl so feel free to reach out. hastyv001@gmail.com or veronicahasty on IG.

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    1. I'm so sorry it's been so hard and such a long road. I'll keep you in my prayers! Oh yes, I know there's so many women facing the same stuggles and I'm glad I'm getting to connect with them! Thank you, I appreciate that!

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  5. My husband and I tried for 4 years. I was told by multiple docotrs, because I wanted a second and 3rd opinion, that I would most likely never have a baby. My body just wasn't going to allow it. We never gave up hope and put all our faith in God. We stopped "trying", stopped tracking, and eventually I gave up hope. Now, less than a year later, my beautiful baby girl is sitting in my lap giggling as I type this. Don't give up hope no matter what the doctors say. Science only goes so far, then comes God.

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    1. What a testimony! I'm so thankful God gave you a baby girl! I love that! God far outweighs what science can do for us. :)

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  6. My heart breaks for you reading this. I haven't personally experienced this but have had a front row seat to the infertility that my sister and her husband have struggled with over the last 4 1/2 years and their journey is still on going. It's a hard road to walk with many valleys. I will be praying for you and Jaime.
    Because He lives we can face tomorrow.

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    1. I know, I've been praying for your sister and think of her often! Thank you so much for the prayers! We appreciate it!

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